The one good thing about Facebook is how someone can post something completely innocent on your wall and it can just get twisted into a whole other (very entertaining) topic. This one started as a comment from my cousin's fiance (and one of my best friends) about how he's officially joining the family in a few months.
Gabe Cousin's Fiance): Can you believe we're gonna be related in a few short months?
RK (My Best Friend): Don't get too excited. I've been a member ofthis family for almost 29 years. It's...alright lol
Me: What do you mean 'almost 29 years'? You turned 29 in June!
Gina (Friend): A gentleman never calls a lady out on her age :p
RK: Amen sister!!
Me: He does when she harasses him about being a whole 3 mos. older than her the entire 29 years.
RK: I knew that would come back to bite me in the ass
CR (My teenager): Wow I'm almost a FULL DECADE YOUNGER than all of you. Cool.
Me: You're grounded.
Gina: Uh you better not also be referring to me with that 'decade' comment missy...
Gabe: Hey! I am not a decade older than you college. Don't insult me by spreading lies. I am gonna be your...um something in law soon so show some respect! lol
RK: That's right G - cling for dear life to your last few weeks of 28 lol
CR: LOL You can't ground me old man I'm TWENTY YEARS OLD! Did I mention that's a DECADE below your nearly 30 status??
RK: Seriously I'm coming to your house with rope and duct tape to silence your rude oldest child Jose.
Gabe: This is why animals eat their young.p
Gina: lol Last weeks of 28?? No idea what you're referring to ;p Please take steps to make sure my sweet little (Miss N) doesn't turn on us all in 18 years like your other one apparently has
Me: :O Old man? Such a nice girl, such a dirty mouth. But you know what? When you're my age (that is TWENTY-NINE btw and 29 it will stay until I decide otherwise lol) (Miss N) will be embarrassed by you too. Ha!
A.C. (My Brother): Gaby it's not too late to change your mind. Just let Tina keep the bling and back away slowly! lol
Me: Oh yeah and Gina - 12 days, 23 hours, 58 minutes. lol
CR: If you can stay 29 (or I'm sorry TWENTY-NINE) then I'ma stay 20. Ha right back.
Gina: Hahaha hon that's not even legal. [Me]-bite me lol
RK: LOL Wow college, good thing you're a creative major and not a smart one.
Gabe: All I wanted was for Jose to tell me how excited he was to finally be relatives but nooo you ladies had to turn my happy family comment and twist it.
Me: Dude, I can't wait to be your whatever-in-law. THE END.
Gabe: Forget it. I don't wanna be related to you people anymore.
lol Ya'll are the most beautiful bunch of weirdos I know. Thank you for making a bad day better. I love you.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
A little talk I had with old friend Agent W (as best as I can recollect anyway):
Me: This one chick like demanded I send her nude pics of me.
Agent W: That is hilarious. Did you do it?
Me: Hell no.
Agent W: Soooo...send me some nudie pics?
Me: You think I'd do it just cuz this isn't our first convo?
Agent W: Yes. And you love me.
Me: I do love you.
Agent W: What's the problem then?
Me: First off, I have none and second...no.
Agent W: Fine. I didn't wanna do this, but... (pause for dramatic purposes) I've decided that I will contract a terminal disease. Expect a letter from the Make-A-Wish Foundation. I hope you comply.
Me: That's a lousy last wish.
Agent W: That's not important. What's important is that you would be a part of my final request.
Me: And I would be honored. But would not comply.
Agent W: Then you would let me die unfulfilled? Wow.
Me: IF you were dying, then you know I'd do it. However I suspect that you are just a pervert and that's not a terminal condition.
Agent W: It's still a sickness dammit, why must you get technical?!
lol I love you Agent W. And the first step is admitting you have a problem.
Me: This one chick like demanded I send her nude pics of me.
Agent W: That is hilarious. Did you do it?
Me: Hell no.
Agent W: Soooo...send me some nudie pics?
Me: You think I'd do it just cuz this isn't our first convo?
Agent W: Yes. And you love me.
Me: I do love you.
Agent W: What's the problem then?
Me: First off, I have none and second...no.
Agent W: Fine. I didn't wanna do this, but... (pause for dramatic purposes) I've decided that I will contract a terminal disease. Expect a letter from the Make-A-Wish Foundation. I hope you comply.
Me: That's a lousy last wish.
Agent W: That's not important. What's important is that you would be a part of my final request.
Me: And I would be honored. But would not comply.
Agent W: Then you would let me die unfulfilled? Wow.
Me: IF you were dying, then you know I'd do it. However I suspect that you are just a pervert and that's not a terminal condition.
Agent W: It's still a sickness dammit, why must you get technical?!
lol I love you Agent W. And the first step is admitting you have a problem.
Singled Out (A Male View) // Co-Parenting & Dating
Don't ya just love double standards? My favorite is the one about single mothers and single father. You know, how single dads are almost universally attractive but single moms not so much. A woman can be gorgeous with few flaws but once a guy finds out she has kids, he finds her less attractive. On the flip side, a man can be okay looking with a handful of flaws and once a woman finds out he has a kid, it cranks his attractiveness up a notch.
Part of this, I know, is about how women and men are wired differently. Men want it all (in this way, we are like children ourselves); we want our mate to be hot. And sexually open. But also be enough of a good girl that we can take her home to mom. Not to mention, if she also were caring and nurturing enough to take care of our future children, that'd be great. And the list goes on. Yes, this is unrealistic but this is the 'ideal woman' for most guys I know. Then there's the territorial testosterone thing of wanting a woman to bear only your children and no one else's (in this way, we are like cavemen). So is this why some men are immediately turned off by a woman who has kids?
I confess I've only ever dated one woman who had a kid (which is not really a good example because she went all fatal attraction on me) but I found her more attractive because she was a good mother. It wasn't at all serious but I never freaked out about having to share her with her little dude (I can't stand clingy women anyway). I also never thought that she was just after someone to have more kids with. It was like any other relationship, except she had different priorities than the single, childless women I've dated. She was looking for different qualities in a guy because her outlook now included another little life.
I've always been a very open dater; race, religion, age, kids or no kids, it's never mattered to me. I know that a huge part of that is my having been raised in a single parent household that did not see color at all. My mom started dating when we were around 4 but we only ever met one of her 'friends' and that wasn't until they started to really get serious (they eventually became engaged). This is what I think is the appropriate way of handling new partners when you're a single parent. I've yet to do this because I'm just returning to the dating pool but I'm a little surprised at just how prevalent this whole double standard thing really is. I go out with my daughter and women don't see a wedding band...instant conversation. I go out all my lonesome and have a convo with someone and mention I'm a father, conversation turns towards that and I inevitably hear, 'How great that you know your child'. (This happened about two months ago and this topic has been on my brain since). I wasn't really sure what to say to that. It's a no-brainer for me that I'm in my child's life but I know not all men feel that way (especially in the situation in which fatherhood came to me) and that's a shame. It's like the standard of parenthood is lower for men. If you stick around at all, it's a big deal which is really unfortunate.
Another reason this is on my mind is because the mother of my daughter is becoming a very active dater of late. She had a semi-serious (or so she says, I don't think it was as serious as she wanted me to believe) relationship with a guy who seemed nice but had a bit of a short fuse. Once he met our daughter he developed this weird kind of jealousy about my relationship with my daughter, almost as if he wanted me out of the picture so the three of them could be one happy little family. That ended awhile ago and now she's seeing a new guy. I didn't know about the newbie until a few weeks ago and he has since met (and scared) our daughter, which is disturbing to me. I'd like to say I don't care who she dates but that's a lie because whoever she decides to be with is also going to be a part of our daughter's life and my life. I'm not exactly encouraged that she's going to choose someone who is...I guess the word is suitable to be a part of our daughter's life. Before we dated she went out with a lot of bad/selfish guys and she seems to be falling back into that pattern. We have such a great relationship but this issue is becoming bigger by the day because I don't think she understands why I have a problem with it. It's like it hasn't sunk in for her yet that our daughter and her and I are permanently connected and anything any of us does is gonna affect the other two. *sigh* Yeah...co-parenting is fun.
Part of this, I know, is about how women and men are wired differently. Men want it all (in this way, we are like children ourselves); we want our mate to be hot. And sexually open. But also be enough of a good girl that we can take her home to mom. Not to mention, if she also were caring and nurturing enough to take care of our future children, that'd be great. And the list goes on. Yes, this is unrealistic but this is the 'ideal woman' for most guys I know. Then there's the territorial testosterone thing of wanting a woman to bear only your children and no one else's (in this way, we are like cavemen). So is this why some men are immediately turned off by a woman who has kids?
I confess I've only ever dated one woman who had a kid (which is not really a good example because she went all fatal attraction on me) but I found her more attractive because she was a good mother. It wasn't at all serious but I never freaked out about having to share her with her little dude (I can't stand clingy women anyway). I also never thought that she was just after someone to have more kids with. It was like any other relationship, except she had different priorities than the single, childless women I've dated. She was looking for different qualities in a guy because her outlook now included another little life.
I've always been a very open dater; race, religion, age, kids or no kids, it's never mattered to me. I know that a huge part of that is my having been raised in a single parent household that did not see color at all. My mom started dating when we were around 4 but we only ever met one of her 'friends' and that wasn't until they started to really get serious (they eventually became engaged). This is what I think is the appropriate way of handling new partners when you're a single parent. I've yet to do this because I'm just returning to the dating pool but I'm a little surprised at just how prevalent this whole double standard thing really is. I go out with my daughter and women don't see a wedding band...instant conversation. I go out all my lonesome and have a convo with someone and mention I'm a father, conversation turns towards that and I inevitably hear, 'How great that you know your child'. (This happened about two months ago and this topic has been on my brain since). I wasn't really sure what to say to that. It's a no-brainer for me that I'm in my child's life but I know not all men feel that way (especially in the situation in which fatherhood came to me) and that's a shame. It's like the standard of parenthood is lower for men. If you stick around at all, it's a big deal which is really unfortunate.
Another reason this is on my mind is because the mother of my daughter is becoming a very active dater of late. She had a semi-serious (or so she says, I don't think it was as serious as she wanted me to believe) relationship with a guy who seemed nice but had a bit of a short fuse. Once he met our daughter he developed this weird kind of jealousy about my relationship with my daughter, almost as if he wanted me out of the picture so the three of them could be one happy little family. That ended awhile ago and now she's seeing a new guy. I didn't know about the newbie until a few weeks ago and he has since met (and scared) our daughter, which is disturbing to me. I'd like to say I don't care who she dates but that's a lie because whoever she decides to be with is also going to be a part of our daughter's life and my life. I'm not exactly encouraged that she's going to choose someone who is...I guess the word is suitable to be a part of our daughter's life. Before we dated she went out with a lot of bad/selfish guys and she seems to be falling back into that pattern. We have such a great relationship but this issue is becoming bigger by the day because I don't think she understands why I have a problem with it. It's like it hasn't sunk in for her yet that our daughter and her and I are permanently connected and anything any of us does is gonna affect the other two. *sigh* Yeah...co-parenting is fun.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Singled Out (A Female View)
My best friend wrote this on her blog last week and I decided to post it here because it's about a topic that's been on my mind lately. She's also 'challenged' me to explore it more from ny angle so we'll see how it works out.
'Single Mother of One
I am a proud single parent. So are two of of my male friends as well as the father of my child. I have recently concluded that the three of them are seen as more attractive to the opposite sex because of their single daddy status. They're all deserving of the attention (not to mention numbers) they get. They're all wonderful men and doting father (to daughter, no less ladies!) I understand the staring.
What about me, you ask? The (gorgeous lol) twenty-something (shut it Ace lol) woman that actually carried and delivered this miracle into the world? Nada. I seem to be considered 'damaged goods'. I haven't even been back on the dating scene for very long and I'm already finding the pickins slim. So let us run through the basic types of men I have come across (so far, God help me if there are more, worse types) in my adventures, shall we?
Type 1: The (Seemingly) Great Guy - (Side note: I am now a firm believer in saying that I have a child fairly soon into the date. But I didn't do that with this one who was the second guy I dated post-baby) The seemingly great guy is one that is good looking, single and not a player. Your basic good guy on the lookout for a great girl. He opens doors and is polite and intelligent. He's the kinda guy you woulda been all up on in your pre-baby days. But then you mention that you have a child and he suddenly tunes out and the once great date date fumbles.
What you said: 'I have a child'
What he heard: Either A) 'She must want more kids like tomorrow. Get out while you can man!!' or B) 'Oh she already had someone else's baby...gross'
================
Type 2: The Wannabe Savior - This is the man who sees a single mother as 'the little woman' and her child as 'the deprived baby'. He sees himself completing the picture and saving these poor souls from their (supposed) sad, single existence, primarily in a financial way. An instant family, if you will. He also believes they should be eternally grateful for this. After all, who else would want them but him? Who else would save them if not for him? He believes he's the only man on earth who could ever give you what you wnat/need.
What you said: 'It can be hard being a single parent'
What he heard: 'I can't afford to give my child much of anything and I need a man to make us a family.'
================
Type 3: Mr. ASSumption - You know this guy single Mamas. You've probably dated a few of this type, at least. He's the one who seems nice enough at the start but who assumes that you can't/won't do anything fun because you're a mom. He believes that your life somehow stopped when you became a mother. He assumes you must be socially retarded in some way because you must spend your days immersed in all things baby and have no time to keep up with current events of any kind. And forget about doing anything fun in the bedroom because you can't now that you're a mom. Raunchy kinky sex? Nope cuz she's got a kid and probably thinks it's inappropriate. Party weekend in Vegas? Nope cuz she'll probably wanna bring along the rugrat.
What you said: 'I love to drink every once in and awhile'
What he assumes: 'She probably means juice boxes'
====================================================
Contrary to popular belief fellas, not all single mothers talk about their children every minute of every day. Nor do we all go back into the dating world looking for someone to father our future children asap. And we certainly don't all lose who we are as women once we give birth. In fact, we have a better handle on who we are and what we want because we gave birth. (Unfortunately for some of you since we usually want men and not boys by this point) Oh and you know what we had to do in order to have babies in the first place? S-E-X. And some of us are still damn good at it. And if you guys weren't soooooo focused on our kids and freaking out about how we must want more, you'd see that single moms are quite possibly some of the best catches out there. We're self-sufficient, loving and non-clingy. And if you can handle that you will not be our entire world and you can be, oh I don't know, a GROWN-ASS MAN about it all, then a single mom just might be for you.'
'Single Mother of One
I am a proud single parent. So are two of of my male friends as well as the father of my child. I have recently concluded that the three of them are seen as more attractive to the opposite sex because of their single daddy status. They're all deserving of the attention (not to mention numbers) they get. They're all wonderful men and doting father (to daughter, no less ladies!) I understand the staring.
What about me, you ask? The (gorgeous lol) twenty-something (shut it Ace lol) woman that actually carried and delivered this miracle into the world? Nada. I seem to be considered 'damaged goods'. I haven't even been back on the dating scene for very long and I'm already finding the pickins slim. So let us run through the basic types of men I have come across (so far, God help me if there are more, worse types) in my adventures, shall we?
Type 1: The (Seemingly) Great Guy - (Side note: I am now a firm believer in saying that I have a child fairly soon into the date. But I didn't do that with this one who was the second guy I dated post-baby) The seemingly great guy is one that is good looking, single and not a player. Your basic good guy on the lookout for a great girl. He opens doors and is polite and intelligent. He's the kinda guy you woulda been all up on in your pre-baby days. But then you mention that you have a child and he suddenly tunes out and the once great date date fumbles.
What you said: 'I have a child'
What he heard: Either A) 'She must want more kids like tomorrow. Get out while you can man!!' or B) 'Oh she already had someone else's baby...gross'
================
Type 2: The Wannabe Savior - This is the man who sees a single mother as 'the little woman' and her child as 'the deprived baby'. He sees himself completing the picture and saving these poor souls from their (supposed) sad, single existence, primarily in a financial way. An instant family, if you will. He also believes they should be eternally grateful for this. After all, who else would want them but him? Who else would save them if not for him? He believes he's the only man on earth who could ever give you what you wnat/need.
What you said: 'It can be hard being a single parent'
What he heard: 'I can't afford to give my child much of anything and I need a man to make us a family.'
================
Type 3: Mr. ASSumption - You know this guy single Mamas. You've probably dated a few of this type, at least. He's the one who seems nice enough at the start but who assumes that you can't/won't do anything fun because you're a mom. He believes that your life somehow stopped when you became a mother. He assumes you must be socially retarded in some way because you must spend your days immersed in all things baby and have no time to keep up with current events of any kind. And forget about doing anything fun in the bedroom because you can't now that you're a mom. Raunchy kinky sex? Nope cuz she's got a kid and probably thinks it's inappropriate. Party weekend in Vegas? Nope cuz she'll probably wanna bring along the rugrat.
What you said: 'I love to drink every once in and awhile'
What he assumes: 'She probably means juice boxes'
====================================================
Contrary to popular belief fellas, not all single mothers talk about their children every minute of every day. Nor do we all go back into the dating world looking for someone to father our future children asap. And we certainly don't all lose who we are as women once we give birth. In fact, we have a better handle on who we are and what we want because we gave birth. (Unfortunately for some of you since we usually want men and not boys by this point) Oh and you know what we had to do in order to have babies in the first place? S-E-X. And some of us are still damn good at it. And if you guys weren't soooooo focused on our kids and freaking out about how we must want more, you'd see that single moms are quite possibly some of the best catches out there. We're self-sufficient, loving and non-clingy. And if you can handle that you will not be our entire world and you can be, oh I don't know, a GROWN-ASS MAN about it all, then a single mom just might be for you.'
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
The Live Keep Living
I write a lot but it occurred to me the other day that I don't write nearly as much as I used to. Not just on here (and I am gonna try and write more on here) but in general. I've been writing as long as I can remember. I was the only kid in my third grade English class that loved every single assignment. My first girlfriend also loved to write and really encouraged me to put down anything I was feeling. Her writing helped her get past her troubled childhood and, later, her father's sudden death. I remember thinking how terrible it was for her to have so much to get off her chest at such a young age. Obviously I had no idea that I would be in the same position just a few years later.
She's been on my mind a lot lately. It's been eight years since she went away and everything changed dramatically. I try not to think of her much because it usually sends me to a bad place. But I've realized that in the last year or so, I've finally gotten to a place where I can think of her and actually smile. That is a tremendous accomplishment for me. And it all started with a simple conversation back in April.
My first love's mother (and her entire family, really) did not care for me at all. I never knew why, it was just one of those things that I accepted. I often wondered how someone as amazing as my girlfriend could be related to the rest of her family. They all seemed so domineering and un-emotional, while she was incredibly passionate and open and loving. She and I knew everything there was to know about each other and we fit so well but when you're young, it's tough to keep stuff together. You wanna experience and learn all you can about other people and about the world and you think you have all the time in the world to do it. I rarely spoke to her mom or sister in the entire time (about seven years) we knew each other. I didn't speak to them for a very long time after my girlfriend went away. I don't think any of us would've known what to say to each other anyway.
I didn't know it until much later, but my girlfriend had always felt like she wasn't meant to stay in this world for a long time so she made sure to take care of everything she might leave behind. She left a lot of her stuff to me, including everything she'd ever written or filmed or drawn. All of it sat in storage for around five years because I couldn't bring myself to look at any of it. I finally sat down and went through it and I knew most of what she'd written about, but the short films she left behind were just...suffocating for me to watch. They brought a whole new set of nightmares. Her family believed that everything she had should've gone to them and not me and they tried to get it all back through the court system. For awhile I felt like they were right because it's not like we had been married. But then I thought about how she'd felt about her family and how she loved them but obviously didn't trust them with her thoughts and feelings if she'd left all of this to me. So I fought to hang onto it.
Things were getting very ugly in our legal battle earlier this year when her mother came by my place and asked to talk. This was a no-no according to the lawyers but I sensed something different about her so I agreed. We sat, just the two of us, in the kitchen talking about everything we missed and loved about this wonderful person. We talked about how it didn't seem like she'd been gone eight years but it also seemed like much longer, in a way. Then we got to what the root of our problem had been all these years and it was something I'd never thought of before. She told me she was jealous of the relationship I'd had with her daughter. She felt she'd made serious mistakes in her upbringing and she'd never apologized for those. And she felt that her failures had led to their strained relationship and had kept her from really knowing her daughter as well as she wanted to. I came into the picture and I helped my girlfriend calm down and deal with things and we became extremely close and that led her to pull away from her family some because she had somewhere safe to go. Her mom has a lot of regrets about how things were between them.
It was a painful and very eye-opening conversation to have. I can't shake how sad it is that we couldn't get along when the person we loved was alive but that's how it was supposed to be, I guess. Guilt is something I never thought about her mom having felt after she left, yet it's something I wrestled with for a very long time. I still do sometimes. We feel/felt it for different reasons but it is the same emotion at the end of the day. We came to an understanding that we're similar in a lot of ways. And, for the first time, I saw a lot of my girlfriend in her mother. I hadn't thought about it until our conversation but we're always gonna be oddly connected because we both loved the same person. And I can't imagine losing a child, my daughter is the one thing I've ever been involved in that's been perfect, so I now see this situation through very different eyes. I think part of my being able to think of her without it being a negative is having this new relationship with her mother. Don't get me wrong, it's still rough some days and I'm not sure how one ever 'gets over it' but I can deal now. Much better than I used to be able to. You never forget but you have to learn to move on and it's taken me a long while to learn that. But I'm glad that I had to have that convo to really get there.
She's been on my mind a lot lately. It's been eight years since she went away and everything changed dramatically. I try not to think of her much because it usually sends me to a bad place. But I've realized that in the last year or so, I've finally gotten to a place where I can think of her and actually smile. That is a tremendous accomplishment for me. And it all started with a simple conversation back in April.
My first love's mother (and her entire family, really) did not care for me at all. I never knew why, it was just one of those things that I accepted. I often wondered how someone as amazing as my girlfriend could be related to the rest of her family. They all seemed so domineering and un-emotional, while she was incredibly passionate and open and loving. She and I knew everything there was to know about each other and we fit so well but when you're young, it's tough to keep stuff together. You wanna experience and learn all you can about other people and about the world and you think you have all the time in the world to do it. I rarely spoke to her mom or sister in the entire time (about seven years) we knew each other. I didn't speak to them for a very long time after my girlfriend went away. I don't think any of us would've known what to say to each other anyway.
I didn't know it until much later, but my girlfriend had always felt like she wasn't meant to stay in this world for a long time so she made sure to take care of everything she might leave behind. She left a lot of her stuff to me, including everything she'd ever written or filmed or drawn. All of it sat in storage for around five years because I couldn't bring myself to look at any of it. I finally sat down and went through it and I knew most of what she'd written about, but the short films she left behind were just...suffocating for me to watch. They brought a whole new set of nightmares. Her family believed that everything she had should've gone to them and not me and they tried to get it all back through the court system. For awhile I felt like they were right because it's not like we had been married. But then I thought about how she'd felt about her family and how she loved them but obviously didn't trust them with her thoughts and feelings if she'd left all of this to me. So I fought to hang onto it.
Things were getting very ugly in our legal battle earlier this year when her mother came by my place and asked to talk. This was a no-no according to the lawyers but I sensed something different about her so I agreed. We sat, just the two of us, in the kitchen talking about everything we missed and loved about this wonderful person. We talked about how it didn't seem like she'd been gone eight years but it also seemed like much longer, in a way. Then we got to what the root of our problem had been all these years and it was something I'd never thought of before. She told me she was jealous of the relationship I'd had with her daughter. She felt she'd made serious mistakes in her upbringing and she'd never apologized for those. And she felt that her failures had led to their strained relationship and had kept her from really knowing her daughter as well as she wanted to. I came into the picture and I helped my girlfriend calm down and deal with things and we became extremely close and that led her to pull away from her family some because she had somewhere safe to go. Her mom has a lot of regrets about how things were between them.
It was a painful and very eye-opening conversation to have. I can't shake how sad it is that we couldn't get along when the person we loved was alive but that's how it was supposed to be, I guess. Guilt is something I never thought about her mom having felt after she left, yet it's something I wrestled with for a very long time. I still do sometimes. We feel/felt it for different reasons but it is the same emotion at the end of the day. We came to an understanding that we're similar in a lot of ways. And, for the first time, I saw a lot of my girlfriend in her mother. I hadn't thought about it until our conversation but we're always gonna be oddly connected because we both loved the same person. And I can't imagine losing a child, my daughter is the one thing I've ever been involved in that's been perfect, so I now see this situation through very different eyes. I think part of my being able to think of her without it being a negative is having this new relationship with her mother. Don't get me wrong, it's still rough some days and I'm not sure how one ever 'gets over it' but I can deal now. Much better than I used to be able to. You never forget but you have to learn to move on and it's taken me a long while to learn that. But I'm glad that I had to have that convo to really get there.
Monday, September 13, 2010
What To Do, What To Do
My cousin is a great guy. Love him to death. We have clashed in the past over my life decisions, amongst other things, but we know we'll always make up. He dated someone for a very long time and they got engaged but could never get married. He's been single about a year and two weeks ago started dating a mutual friend. She's a wonderful woman, a cancer survivor at 32 and I felt it was a good match because she could teach him so much. This morning he tells me that they're gonna get married. My first thought was that he meant they were gonna get engaged soon and work on the marriage thing. But no, he meant they wanna get hitched next weekend. I've wrestled all day with whether or not I should say anything about, oh, I don't know, how ridiculous an idea this really is. He's wasted no time in the past telling me what I was doing wrong but I always hated it. So do I speak up or do I keep quiet?
I would love nothing more than for him to be happy. But if they really are in love, it should stick around for awhile, right? They should believe they will still be in love in a month or a year or ten years and therefore shouldn't rush. That's what I think. But then I was the victim of an all too quick engagement that ended very badly so maybe I'm just being over-protective. I don't know. I guess I'll see how this week plays out for them (and the rest of the fam).
In other news, I hate this couch. I am tired of sittting on it. But I did leave the house today so maybe I'm willing my recovery to go faster.
I would love nothing more than for him to be happy. But if they really are in love, it should stick around for awhile, right? They should believe they will still be in love in a month or a year or ten years and therefore shouldn't rush. That's what I think. But then I was the victim of an all too quick engagement that ended very badly so maybe I'm just being over-protective. I don't know. I guess I'll see how this week plays out for them (and the rest of the fam).
In other news, I hate this couch. I am tired of sittting on it. But I did leave the house today so maybe I'm willing my recovery to go faster.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Talent Upon Talent
I spent the weekend visiting family and it was very relaxing. That is, until I decided to pack while slightly intoxicated. As you know, I am injury-prone in the simplest situations. I once contracted whooping cough (seriously, I was like, 'what is this, the 1800's?') and coughed so hard that I cracked a rib. That was painful, I thought. But I now know true pain, my friends. I was taking my bags down my aunt's dead man's curve staircase (that's right, I blame your stairs) when I tripped on a hockey stick lying on the floor and fell. Somehow, I managed to avoid a head injury but I did break two ribs and puncture a lung. Ouch. That's not even a strong enough word, it hurts to breathe and it hurts to move. So I've been moving as little as possible. But I can't not breathe and still live so that has been a challenge. I punctured a lung during my accident yet managed to avoid breaking any ribs so this is new. And did I mention painful? Cuz it really is. Six weeks is the time it'll take for me to start feeling better and it cannot come quick enough. It's rough to try and sleep. But, as always, I will survive.
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