Sometimes It's Hard To Be A Woman

A friend of mine rescued a dog last year and there's been some touch and go moments of acclimating to her new surroundings. Last week, the dog got spooked and tried to run off, injuring her mother when she tried to hold onto her (it's a big dog, ya'll). And then today all of this happened...

Her: I don't wanna go to work. There was a fire not far from us, and the smell of smoke/strong wind is freaking the dog out.
Me: Well you have to go because Babu ain't gonna support hisself
Her: I went to work after all. I need to keep you in the standard of living that you're accustomed to, and if I took today off, I'd have to work the next 6 days straight.
Me: Great, now I look like a hard ass for making you go to work amongst all the smoke
Her: lol Not to mention abandoning my scared child
Me: LOL. It's not like I'm forcing you down into the mines, Loretta Lynn.
Her: LMAO
Me: And need I remind you, your scared child tried to free itself from your regime last week lol
Her: lol Dammit

Coast To Coast, L.A. To Chicago

Me: I can't sleep
Her: Awww, and you called me instead of your flavor of the week. 
Me: Well of course I did. It would've been awkward to call her two hours after I said, "Hey gurl, you gotta go home".
Her: LOL. Sometimes I wonder how you find dates. And then I look at my caller ID pic of you and remember you're pretty.
Me: lol Sometimes I call you at 3:30 because I can't sleep. And then you insult me and I remember why we don't work.
Her: lol We don't work because you're a whore...or maybe that's why we did work...I don't remember. Let's just get naked and maybe that will remind us what's what.
Me: LOL. That was smoove. Real smoove.
Her: lol You get what you pay for at 3AM. And this call was free.

X Marks The Spot

I recently began binge watching "The X-Files" and if you know anything about me, this may seem like an odd choice of show. I have terrible memories of my mom watching it in my youth, mostly of the awful theme music and assorted spooky images in the title sequence. However, the show itself isn't as alien-centric as I thought it was. It's basically a detective show that delves into some of the unknowns in our universe. Some of them are pretty spooky, and I sure as hell ain't watching the show once the sun goes down, but so far I'm enjoying both it and the convos it's provoked.

Me: I'm is scared
Her: Shhhh....I'm here *pet pet pet*
Me: If I see anything that looks like an alien, I'm turning off the TV and putting it in the freezer like Joey did when he read, "The Shining".
Her: LOL. Good luck with that.

==========

After an ex texted me with some...interesting news.

Me: The irony of this is that yesterday when she texted me, I was watching "The X-Files". I was worried about the aliens. I shoulda been worried about actual exes.
Friend: LOL Well damn.

==========

Me: I told my mom the "X-Files" I watched last night showed an alien fetus and I might be scarred for life. She said the upside is that my lifespan is a lot shorter now than it was when I was a kid who was scarred by the opening theme.
W: LOL Want some aloe for that burn?
Me: I just love when I turn to her for some motherly love and she reminds me I'm not her favorite kid
W: LOL Cheer up buttercup, it's not like she has a bunch of alternative kids to choose from
W: You'll never be in 3rd place! Woooo!
Me: lol Uh, she has three kids. I'm already in third place
W: LOL At least your wife forgot about the other brother and not you! WOOOOO!
Me: LOL. Gold star for you. Bless your little, possibly drunken, heart
W: lol Damn... When motivational speeches go wrong

Waiting On The Thunder

Last year I decided to be open to all forms of finding a potential life mate, including being set up by friends. I only went on a few set-ups, one disastrous and one not too shabby. But all of that seems to be on the brink of changing now that my friend S has arrived Stateside. I've known S for at least a decade now and she prides herself on trying to fix other's personal lives purely because she has no intention of dealing with her own. The thing is, her set-ups are, shall we say, hit and miss. I've yet to have the pleasure of being set-up by her but she's decided it's her mission whilst she's in town to get me back out into the world of dating. I'm a little afraid because after she declared her intentions she added, "Now...let me go through my Rolodex and get back to you" and I'm not sure if I'm supposed to be preparing for a blind date set in the 90's or in 2016. But the best relationship I ever had the privilege of being a part of began on a blind date, and one that was not very well researched (we were basically set up purely because we were both single and our families lived next door to each other, cuz who cares about things in common, right?), so I guess you never know. As long as S knows more about this person than, "She's my neighbor and she's available," I'm good.

Be The Change You Wish To See

I just found out that people of color are supposed to be considering boycotting the Oscars telecast because of the lack of diversity amongst the nominees. The person who started this whole movement to boycott was Jada Pinkett Smith, which I find to be quite ironic for a few reasons. The first one being that Will Smith was in the running for an Oscar nomination, which he obviously didn't get. Almost exactly one year ago, when he wasn't getting Oscar buzz, a reporter asked Will about his view on racism and the lack of diversity in Hollywood and his response was, "I don't really think that it's too much of a problem. In terms of what's snubbed and what's not snubbed, people vote for the movies that they want to vote for and they have that right.". What a difference a year and being snubbed himself make, huh? While I agree with him that people have the right to vote for the movies they want, it's obvious there is often a lack of diversity at the Oscars. Were there movies featuring actors of color that were Oscar-worthy? Probably. But you can't have it both ways, you can't say there isn't really any problem and then, when the problem affects you, come out and shout from the rooftops that the system isn't fair. I have my doubts as to whether Jada would've gone at the Oscars the way she did had her husband not been affected by this year's lack of diversity amongst its nominees.
Boycotting the Oscars does not fix the root of the issue here and that is the fact that people of color do not get near the amount of opportunities to shine that white folks do. That's just a fact in Hollywood, not even something up for debate. Hell, news outlets can't even tell the difference between two Latina actresses. Minorities have had their moments in the Oscar spotlight, but it's not even about the awards so much as equality in general. If you want more diversity, then you have to get more people of color into more starring and co-starring roles. The ideal outcome would be that it's no longer newsworthy when an African-American wins a particular category, or a Latino is nominated in a category for the first time, or a woman wins Best Director. But we're a long way from that. A group of people not watching the Oscars doesn't fix or change anything, it just takes away viewership from an award show that often sees a drop in ratings anyway.
The Smiths own their own production company and they have produced 20 projects, mostly movies but a few TV shows, since 1997. To their credit, only one of those projects boasts an all white lead cast, and another was written, directed by and starred a mostly Asian cast. However, of the remaining 18 projects, 12 were either directed by or featured a member of the Smith family in a starring or co-starring role, with a 13th project in the works also starring Will. That means that in almost 20 years of existence, the Smiths' production company has only made 6 films and one TV show featuring people of color who were not named Will, Jada or Jaden Smith. It's progress, sure, but it's not exactly a shining example of people with money, power and a platform trying to change the system. It could be said that it's just too hard to get projects with minorities attached to the lead produced, and it definitely is, but it's not impossible. If you really want to give the industry a kick in the ass, then seek out projects that don't star your family members, projects that benefit the cause. Will Smith has had a great career, and I'm sure it hasn't always come easy to him, but he got that chance because producers who wanted to see a shift in the industry took a chance on him. Why not use your platform to do the same, rather than making a fuss only when you're the one affected by the lack of diversity?

I Miss The Sound Of Your Voice, The Loudest Thing In My Head

This year will mark 14 years since my first love departed and while it has gotten somewhat easier to function without her in the last few years, loss leaves a hole that you can never quite fill. It's amazing what kind of things will send you thinking about the person you lost. Sometimes it's a song, sometimes it's a quote. And sometimes your mind just wanders. I'm kind of a hoarder in that I save things like emails and voicemails for various reasons. The main reason being that my memory is horrible and getting worse by the year and I want to be able to remember important things. There's one voicemail in particular that I've saved for 14 years; in my voicemail inbox, on my computer and backed up on numerous hard drives. If not for that voicemail, I'm sure I would have forgotten what my first love sounded like since my memory is crap. I rarely listen to it, but was feeling brave and decided to do so last night. And it was okay. It didn't destroy me emotionally, it didn't send me into a depression. It made me smile, actually. It was nice to hear her voice again. But it did make me wish for more. And that wishing for more made me miss her something fierce. Loss is a bitch ya'll.

Folsom Elementary Blues

Me: Now I know how my mom felt when my school called her. You know you have to go, but you think of ways to distance yourself from your kid and their transgression.

Friend: LOL So the rumors are true! Your kids are your parents' revenge.

Me: I suggested we blame Gio and go with, "them Italians is shifty". MOC agreed.

Friend: lol Ya'll need Jesus

Me: I'm sure we'll find him in prison after Miss N takes us all down with her.

Friend: LOL

I've recently begun watching "Saved By The Bell" again from the beginning with my 16-year-old niece who is tickled by such things as Zach Morris' gigantic cell phone and brightly colored tank tops being an acceptable form of clothing to wear to any and all 90's events. Often, I've found myself thinking, "That Zack Morris and his schemes are a riot, but I'm sure glad he's not my kid". And then I found out that Miss N is basically a little Zack Morris. You'll recall a few years back, my beautiful little weirdo of a daughter was caught marking up the price on Pixie Stix on the playground, charging 25 cents per stick even though a whole package only costs $1. I'm sad (or oddly proud, haven't decided which yet) to say that she's escalated. MOC got a call earlier this week that Miss N was taking bets on who would pass a math test. The teacher discovered this little scheme when, after said test, a number of her classmates walked over and handed Miss N their morning snack. Whilst I'm proud that Miss N will evidently have no trouble making a good living for herself in the future, I'm a little concerned about how easily she's come up with both schemes. I mean, the child is SEVEN. Shouldn't this kind of stuff be reserved for older kids? Like kids in their twenties? *sigh* I guess MOC, Gio and I have to face the fact that our little one is not so little anymore. She'll be eight in a few months, which is veering dangerously close to "tween" territory. It really is a shame they can't stay youngins forever. I loved Miss N's younger years, even the things most parents would probably find annoying (like lack of sleep). And now it's a new chapter.