You would think cutting a friend/ex out of your life that you've known for a long time would be difficult. For me, it wasn't a huge strain just because I think I'd been expecting to have to step away from her for quite some time. In the month or so that we've not been speaking, I can honestly say I haven't thought of her once. I've been so happy with the person I'm with and with everything going on in my life that I haven't had the time to think about her. So imagine my shock when this person I'm not talking to showed up at my door. And it was not a good reunion. Not at all. It was like something snapped in her head and, since she was in town, she decided to come by and make my life difficult. I had such a wonderful yesterday and today wasn't going too bad and now this. Seriously, the first words out of her mouth when she walked in were, 'Are you seriously gonna marry this girl?'. Not exactly how you wanna start a conversation. I don't know what she heard or where she heard it but those words started quite the argument.
Here's what I don't get - for months now, all I've heard about is how happy she is with her boyfriend/fiance/whatever he is and how he is likely the one for her. When I was alone, it didn't bother me. Now, it doesn't bother me. But if you're soooooo happy with this dude, why are you at my door demanding that I justify my decisions to you?? It's like she just doesn't get that our personal lives are no longer entangled. What I do has absolutely no effect on what she does. I get that she still feels like we should be together. She feels like this arrangement of all or nothing isn't fair but obviously she can't handle anything but that.
I'm happy right now and I can't believe she can't accept that. I would never, ever show up at any one's door and demand something from them if I knew they were happy and moved on. I don't know her as well as I used to but I still get the feeling that she's not telling me all of the reasons why she won't let go. And I don't know how to make her tell me what's going on. And part of me doesn't wanna know. Sadly, another part doesn't care.
