I have about eight posts that are in various states of completion so I decided to combine a couple because I'm a bit lazy today. It's like a blotter of random crap. Don't worry, it won't be a common occurrence. We will return to our regularly scheduled blogging soon.
=============
Damned If You Do, Damned If You Don't
My medical stuff has potentially taken a turn in the past few days. I feel okay and, thankfully, the side effects of the steroids have been less. But the doc thinks it might be better for me to start a new form of treatment sooner rather than later. It was decided that I could try the steroids for a few more weeks and then if my levels weren't where they needed to be, we would try the next option. The problem for me is I've done some research on the next option and it leaves much to be desired. Steroids make me a crazy person sometimes (although my stubborn nature seems to be helpful in overpowering some of the side effects) but this new drug is basically a cancer medication and the side effects are literally a mile long. But that's not even the scariest part. Apparently this medication has been linked to some brain disorder that kills people in a matter of months. That do not sound pleasant. Also, while I only have to take this one four times a month, it has to be done in a hospital intravenously and I have to plan to sit there for at least three hours at a time. Ugh. I don't know what to do. The doc says it's "unlikely" my levels will get where they need to be with the steroids and he's uncomfortable tapering off the dosage when I'm not stable. But the side effects of the new drug could be worse than the benefits. So after researching some more, I decided I want to give the steroids a little more time. It's likely not going to make things any worse anyway. The doctor has decided to try and convince me otherwise and we have a meeting in the A.M. so he can address my concerns and we can figure out what actually comes next. *sigh*...Decisions to make...
==============
Scenes From A "Marriage"
Today, for the first time in EONS, I got to talk to a friend of mine (the one previously mentioned to be dating a holy man) that is better known as my "wife", if only on Facebook. Awhile back she was being pestered by some dude on her FB page to come to a singles mixer or something and to get him off her back she listed me as her husband. It worked and the dude backed off and we've both been too lazy to change it since (but I also don't use FB much anymore so I don't really care what my status is). It makes for good comedy anyway. How many people can talk about the people they're dating with their "spouse"? Anyway, here are a few highlights from our conversation of awesomeness.
W: And the dingbat Kardashians....
Me: How fucking ridiculous is that? 72 days.
W: Thank you!
W: Even you would last longer.
Me: lol Um...thanks for that backhanded compliment.
W: lol I was about to say, "You're welcome for the vote of confidence."
=====
W: I'm Catholic but just to get the holy man going, I mention the Easter bunny and Jesus in the same sentence.
=====
W: My co-worker's roomie will call and say, "W., this is God...I know what you're doing at night. And I don't approve."
Me: lol My wife will talk to me about the little Jesus on the shoulder of whatever lady friend I happen to have at the time.
W: LOL
W: There are all kindsa things wrong with what you just said that they would freak out any person that didn't already know us.
=====
W: Speak of the reincarnated devil.
Me: Ok, it's the second post on the page.
W: I don't have the link saved on this computer.
Me: Oh for the love of reincarnated God, hang on...
W: LMAO
==============
Waisted
A few weeks ago, I had a little too much to drink on the advice of my mother. I had pain in my shoulder and she told me to have a drink to relax. I had like six drinks and I is not as steady on my feet after six drinks as I was in the pre-steroid era. But texting turned out to be my real problem. Basically if I tried to write more than five words in a text, I made a typo. It provided fun for my loved ones and, whilst my shoulder pain went away, my head throbbed for days after. Let this be a lesson kids - NEVER drink and text. And NEVER trust your mom when she says drinking will solve your problems.
"I may be a little durnk"
(Self-explanatory)
"Wouldn't it be cool if you died?"
(My attempt at...actually, even if you know the story behind it it doesn't make it any better so let's move on.)
"My mam told me to drunk for my shoulder pan"
(Change 'mam' to 'mom' and 'drunk' to 'drink'. Oh yeah and it should be 'pain', not 'pan'.)
"Well she's gonna be someone else's bird so you have to get over to her."
('Bride' was the word I was looking for. Also, there should be no 'to' between 'over' and 'her'.)
"I didn't know you were such a rapist"
(Was supposed to say 'racist'.)
Friend: "Maybe you should stop texting, I think you're too wasted."
Me: "Waisted. You know I'm a gramma whore."
Friend: "LMAO! Read that back."
Me: "Damn it. WASTED. You had it right."
Friend: "Uh, I'm more concerned with you whoring out grandmas dude."
(Again, self-explanatory)
