Friend: Shoot, my mom's going out to a party...I'm in my pjs
Me: LOL. That sentence...sums up our lives now
Friend: lol It does, doesn't it?
Friend: I just told her, 'Don't be home too late!'
Me: Tell her not to come home pregnant
Friend: I did and she said 'kay'
Me: You know what that means...you're gonna be a grandma before she graduates
Friend: *falls to her knees*Nooooooooooooooo!!!!
Me: We're Mexican, this needs to be more telenovela. You need to fall to your knees as a Priest walks in and your mom's step-brother is revealed to be the father of her baby
Friend: Not accurate enough.
Friend: I'm pregnant too and the priest walking in is the father
Me: Still not enough. You're pregnant and you don't know whether the priest or a female friend is the father
Friend: The baby's Asian! OOOOOHHHHHHH SNAP!
Me: The priest is Jewish! OOOOOOOOYYYY VEY!
Friend: LOL!!!
=====================
Me: And bc you are the holiest whore I know
Friend: LOL when we have our nighttime talk show, our backup band will be The Holy Whores
Me: LOL YES!!Me: Padre Judio and the Holy Whores, ladies and gentlemen!
Friend: Phil Collins is going to rewrite his song in our honor and call it JujuJudio
Me: LOL Oh man, I can't breatheMe: Now I have that damn Phil Collins song stuck in my head and I don't even like that song
Friend: LOL It's stuck in my head too
=====================
Me: Flip phones: $50 (in the 90's), Liquor: $0 (cuz we stole it), Creating a telenovela with a Jew and rewriting Phil Collins on a Saturday night: PRICELESS
Me: *clink*
Friend: LOL I love you
