Life is funny...back in the dark ages, I would've been the one that everyone was worried about and wanted to slap because I was doing something stupid. But my how the tables have turned. My cousin is determined to make a decision so stupid that if it were possible, I'd fly back east and slap him my damn self. I'm a little surprised at his decision making lately. He's been one of the most even keeled people I've ever known up until the last few years or so. Back in 2013, he met AK, and she quickly became one of my most favorite people on the planet. She's hilarious, she's inappropriate, she's just my kinda people, and the family's kinda people. Her best friend is dating one of his close friends and she decided to introduce AK and the cousin. It was a slow burn, to say the least. He was coming off that ridiculousness with his ex and trying to make sense of her turning around and marrying some other fool five minutes later. Eventually they did start dating casually but then it abruptly ended for about six months. They got back together last year and for awhile things seemed great. But he started to become somewhat...distant, I guess. You could tell she adored him and was hoping things would work out between them, but they were apart a lot for work and he claimed that was the reason things weren't going smoothly. So she started making an effort to go along with him on work trips and bring him with her whenever possible. But nothing changed. Normally, I would be one of the people he'd talk to about whatever is going on but he's isolated himself from a lot of us lately in favor of work. Word slowly started to make its way through the family that he may be seeing someone else on the side, but I wasn't sure I believed it. Then, my bro-in-law sent a text that changed everything.
AM is the cousin's high school sweetheart. They met when they were 15 and dated until they were about 20. She went overseas for college and he stayed in the States and it became too difficult to maintain a relationship so they amicably split. He dated someone else for a few years, then met the beast from hell that was his girlfriend for the next 7 years. Early in that relationship, it was apparent that she was VERY jealous of the friendship he maintained with AM. In fact, while he and the beast were in conflict after only about a year together, he went out with a group of friends that included AM purely so he could flaunt the friendship to the beast. Once they reunited, she made it clear that he wasn't to keep in touch with AM, which we all found ridiculous but the cousin went along with it. A few years later, and out of nowhere, AM got married and invited him and a few other family members to the wedding. He declined, and never told the beast about the invite, but was obviously taken aback by the announcement. They didn't speak for years after she got married, during which time he and the beast had a nasty breakup. One night in '13, drunk and upset, he called AM and said he wanted to talk and she came out to pick him up and make sure he was okay. Apparently, he professed his love and she told him he was drunk and upset and he'd get over it and take care. As far as I know, they have not spoken since.
My bro-in-law's text yesterday informed me that AM is in the process of getting a divorce from her husband and the cousin, though still in a relationship with AK, is seriously considering asking AM to give their relationship another shot. He seems to believe she's his one that got away and that they're older and (in theory) wiser now and can make it work this time. I mean...the headlines write themselves here, kids. You want to leave someone who loves you and who you told me over the holidays you would seriously consider wifing for someone you haven't even really known for a decade and who is about thirty seconds removed from a marriage? Cuz that has 'good life choice' written all over it. At the end of the day, he and AM are acquaintances. Yes, they dated way back when, during the most formative of their years, but they're both 31 now and a lot of change has happened since. There's a very good chance they're not even compatible anymore. Not to mention, it is sometimes the person we consider our one that got away who we randomly turn to when ish hits the fan. Don't you think she might've reached out to you when she knew it was ending, the way you reached out to her during a rough time way back when? Also, this fool needs to think about whether it's really, really worth it to let AK go. I admit, I didn't see much of a match when I first met her but after seeing then together for a few years, I think she's really good for him. She brings him out of his shell. Yes, we would all be devastated if he chose to end it and she left the family (we sound like the mob in that sentence, but we're slightly less violent than that). But it's not just our feelings about her leaving that are making everyone scratch their heads about his considering ending it for such a ridiculous reason. I really hope he does the right thing...
