My cousin is one of the nicest and smartest people I know. He's also one of the most vulnerable people I know, and that's gotten him into trouble in the past. In high school, he had a girlfriend who treated him like dirt and he just put up with it because he'd become so attached to her. She moved away his Junior year and he began dating someone else who was perfect for him. She was sweet and smart and appreciated what a good guy he is and they were definitely each other's first loves. But once they went off to college it became harder to stay together so they, reluctantly, broke up and dated other people. The next chick he dated was the complete opposite of his first love, in both looks and personality. But they were happy for a few years. She started talking marriage (they were like 20 at the time) and he ended it because he knew she wasn't it for him and he didn't want to lead her on. She didn't take it well. She blamed everything gone wrong in her life on him for years. She also accused him of having cheated on her, which wasn't true at all but I guess was how she needed to spin it to make herself feel better. (They recently ran into each other and she apologized for all of that.) He began dating K about five minutes after that last relationship ended. She was three years younger and all personality and they got along well and she really gelled awesomely with our family. The same was not true for him and her family though; she was raised a conservative Christian and her family really wanted her to marry a dude who was the same (we were raised Catholic, few of us still practice it though). But they thought he was a good guy so they accepted him.
Over the course of the past seven years, my cousin and K had many ups and downs. They broke up at least half a dozen times but it never stuck. She was extremely jealous of his first love and always felt like he was going to go back to her at some point. During one of their first splits, she went out and partied with a bunch of dudes and made sure he found out about it and he told her how that killed him but she didn't see a problem. So he met up with his first love and other friends and made sure K found out about it. She. Went. Ballistic. Yes, it was juvenile for both of them to do that and he only did it to illustrate how she'd made him feel. But he ended up paying for it. She'd only take him back if he agreed not to see his ex again, ever, not even allowed to say a word to her in passing. And he agreed. And they continued on for more years and through more break ups and make ups. They both said they would get married someday and he was ready like three years into the relationship but she wanted to finish school, so they put it off. Then she finished school and he was ready to propose and she said she still wasn't ready to marry. He was fine with that, as long as she said that's where they were headed someday in the next little while. But she couldn't, she suddenly decided she wasn't sure she ever wanted to marry. By now, he also suspected she was having an affair with a dude in her class so he decided to just call it a day and ended it. She was fine with that for awhile and started dating some other guy (not the one from class) and then became engaged to him. The cousin was obviously very taken aback by her decision but figured if she was moving on then he should too and that's when it was finally completely over for him. It seemed like the break-up would overall be pretty effortless. But, oh no. Not even close.
K became unengaged about a month after the dude put a ring on it, and started calling the cousin and asking how he was doing, etc. He told her that they were done and he no longer wished to hear from her, but that he wished her the best. That pissed her off and she kept calling, so he changed his number. What he didn't do is unfriend (defriend? I don't know what the kids call it) her sister on Facebook. So when he posted a picture of him and his first love having lunch (as friends), K's sister saw it and passed along the info. She sent him a nasty email and he told her they were just friends and it was none of her business anyway. However, as of last week, he and his first love are very much back on and somehow K found out about it (we don't know how). Her retaliation is apparently suing him for...we're not exactly sure what. They shared a home for most of their relationship, but he had purchased it before they started dating so I don't think she has any claim to it. However, she's looking for her half of the proceeds from when he sells it, something he's considering doing but has yet to commit to. So far it's just a threat, who knows if it'll actually result in a lawsuit. But damn girl. Let. It. Go. We also used to be friends obviously and she remained friends with some of the fam after they split up but there's no way any of us can stay friends with her now. She's making things more difficult than they need to be. According to one of her friends the cousin is still in touch with, the point of her engagement was to show him she was ready to get married. Wtf? I don't know. It's ridiculous. This isn't like ya'll are apart because life pulled you apart but you're still in love. He doesn't even want to hear her name anymore. He's a great guy and I know this has been hard on him and he doesn't like to be on bad terms with anyone but I know he will not hesitate to cut her completely the hell off if she keeps harassing him. *sigh*...Upside: He's happy with the first love. Everything comes full circle at some point, I guess.
