These conversations both happened this morning:
My sister-in-law's baby shower was last weekend and my mom a cake for it. Agent W asked for the recipe, which I sent her last night. I had a feeling she'd have questions about it. And she did.
W: Thank you for the recipe, I'm having trouble visualizing it but I'm going to give it a shot
Me: I can send you a pic
W: That'd be great! The "layers" confuse me. I was thinking it would be presented as one normal size cake when done. But it sounds like, due to the small portions of the loaf, that it would be prepared serving by serving
Me: Yeah, you put it all in one dish so it looks purty
W: Oh. Huh. How does that work out? I mean cuz short cake loaves are oddly shaped and don't cover the whole plate
Me: I just sent you some pics
Me: You could do one piece per plate too if you wanted to I guess. For the shower, my mom used little ramekin type things and cubed the cake, then put the cream and peaches
W: Note to self: Google ramekin
Me: It's the thing they put creme brulee in, basically a tiny-ish bowl
Me: Just look at the pictures lol
W: I looked at the pictures and I didn't see no stinki'n creme brulee dishes
Me: Those aren't the ones that she made that way. That's the full size cake she made
Me: You know what, just put some peaches on the cake, dip it in the pudding and call it a day
Me: lol This convo has taught me that I shall never be cut out to work the Butterball Turkey Helpline
W: Harumph
W: I can't help that I'm a dumb ass, but thanks abreast
W: ***ANYWAY
Me: LOL
W: I'm going to sit down before I hurt myself
Me: Houston, we have detected the problem
W: lol shut up damn you
W: That cake thing killed my brain.
W: I just tried to unlock the wrong car
Me: LOL Jesus. BUT did you try to unlock the correct side of the car? I feel the need to ask given...well, you know [On another short bus day, she argued with me that the driver's side of her car was on the right side, not the left]
W: LOL the car opens with a clicker, not a key, so I just pushed the clicker thinking the car would be open and then I tried the handle and realized it wasn't my car
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I posted this status to Twitter this morning: "You know you're old as fuck when you say, "I slept great, where did you get those sheets?" after a one nighter." #GladItWasn'tMe
G: LMAO! Did you really??
Me: ...You're gonna have to be more specific lol
G: The one night stand thing on Twitter dude
Me: ...Uh, read it again.
G: I read it twice, it's hilarious. I'm asking whether you actually did it.
Me: Read the full status update, G.
G: I. Read. It. Is. It. True. Wtf if your problem? lol
Me: There's what the kids call a "hashtag" at the end of that status. What did it say?
G: That it wasn't you.
Me: Correct
G: So you didn't really say that?
Me: LMAO. G...Glad it wasn't mean meant I was GLAD IT WAS NOT ME.
G: LMAO. Oh. Duh.
